Friday, June 19, 2015

5 months married

So we have been married for 5 months now...  

i used to rely on Rodman for transport around after work (take train to work hor, u think what)... but i hated the motion sickness i suffer from taking train/bus..

In fact the motion sickness got so bad i can board a crowded bus for less than 30secs then beg the driver to let me out, this one time experience was so bad that i didnt dare board any public transport (nor consider cab because Pandan smell is a pain too), i ended up cancelling on Bitch on our very rare meetup, then sit alone under a strange void deck crying my heart out (without tissue, my God Tissue MUST be pack under any situation in future)... 

....anyway.... i called my parents crying & scared them real bad, i gave them a rough description of my location but am unable to reveal anymore. Dont blame Rodman for not showing up because he was busy organising his company's annual Dinner & i threaten to run away if he leaves the dinner premises.. So Rodman beg my parents for help & gave them my location (because he is a PRo, like a real street smart fellow..) & finally after a whirlwind of emotion that spreads over 3 hours, i was picked up by my parents, driven & fed then sent home (My  parent's place)  where i spend the night and the NEXT 3 DAYS after falling in & out of fever.. 

i guess i was scared real scared, that could trigger the ongoing fever, but whatever the case public transport gives me the creep till today... (and that only took place in march 2015 hahaha)

Anyway, i got lucky & work calls for me to get myself a form of transportation so Timmy came along
& Rodman & i spent lesser time together in the morning:(

You know how couple can hold their hands & take the long journey to work together? Yeah we dont do that anymore, but weekend comes along & we still cherish every moment we can spend together lah, so i guess i cannot complaint (afterall Timmy serves as a very very good companion to save me from the strange motion sickness i developed from MRT/bus. 

So for the past like 5 months we've been married we have stayed together at his parents' place. Thanks again to the new duties at work i hardly spent enough time at home so i appreciate even days when we did simple stuff such as watching 5 consecutive  Stephen Chow's movie over Sunday. Even if there was some whining, it had to come from me because Rodman is such a patient (& boring) guy that doing nothing does not irritate him a single bit. So i guess we make a good couple huh? we compliment each other's flaws.. i am unusually someone who sleeps alot (i sometimes consider myself to be insomnia) but thanks to the very dry things we do over the weekend now, i sometimes sleep up to later afternoon then grab a bite before taking another short nap haha.. 

Then again, i cannot say we are living a bad lives because we do more sports than i would have done in my entire life. With him i feel motivated especially because he always seems to win me in alot of things & i enjoy competition. Every now & then we think we had enough then plan for a mini vacation out of Singapore. The last one being Phuket & man it was so enjoyable i wished we had more time together.. 

I know i haven had much to brag especially since we've only been married for 5 months, but i a glad to say we are still walking the show of our very honeymoon period. Which i will consider an achievement since afterall, i knew him since i was fourteen!! Dated him when i was twenty-one then married him now that i turn twenty-eight. They say its a different lives once we got married, but hey, didnt they also say its a different lives once we started dating?.......     Rodman & i have walked past a century of knowing each other i think we can do a bit more.. 

So 5 months into the marriage and there you have, a short summary of us... no i haven't gotten duties & responsibilities since we have the advantage of staying with my in-law who really takes care of the house very well.. but i might drop by some months later & update when the duties roll... i am happily married & still very much in love with this special man, i still feel fluttery talking about him.. so yeah... signing off for now :)

Thursday, June 18, 2015

Etiquette of a man

Maybe i am superficial, but there are some areas i tend to notice while hanging out with male friends that makes me cringe. 
It could be that they see me as another one of those female friends or perhaps the lack of emphasis on etiquette is a common problem among along of SG mens. 

Gladfully, the man i married has no problem with etiquette, all the more reason why the effect on the men when they didnt do such things is amplified. 

Take for example, opening doors for women
we are not feminist & just because a small proportion of our species decided they are done allowing mens the chance to prove their gentlemen-ness, does not mean the men can slack & walk ahead slamming the door in our face. 
This, i said with a heavy heart because even friends that i meet on "daily" (work together, stay nearby..etc) have this issues. 
And to top it off, because i see myself as less of an importance to this guys because i.e i am married, they have a steady partners, i make the effort to open the doors for them, holding it open while they walk past me without even a "thank-you" 

Men, do you really think this is the era you can slap on some lip balms, wear pink/purple tee from Abercrombie & declare it your favorite shades of fashion & then struts your assets carrying bags on your arm after anyone (men & women) who keeps the door open for you, hold the lift till you enter, holds the food tong in the buffet line till you are done selecting the biggest lobsters before moving onwards to next dish? I dont get it, a simple "thank you" is all it takes for you to be a gentlemen, or have you took the meaning of gentlemen as being men that are generally too "gentle"?

Apart from this "problem" that seems to exit with the guys i befriended, i also notice mens are way past the stage of sharing, in this sense the sharing of food. i enjoy buying an extra set of breakfast for a friend if we are meeting for the rest of the day because, lo & behold, i cannot have you staring or salivating at my food without offering to share them with you then minding the fact that i have smear them good food with my own saliva.   but this guys, really, this guy, he takes the breakfast like it was a matter of fact - then every full brown moon offers to buy breakfast in return. Only the moon does not turn brown for God knows how long so with that schedule on the Calendar, i also did not enjoy the fruit of sharing after offering him breakfast for months. I can count the no. of times he decided to treat us a round of drinks but reminded us, like a cranky old radio on repeat, that he has paid off his "debt" with this treat.  

It's a pain, really, to keep my mouth shut trying not to "remind" him in return to take into account all the food we have share with him for this God-sent cup of free drink. Nevertheless, when this happens i can only put the blame on myself for expecting kindness to beget kindness but God forbid mankind to think this way.   Some people need to be push by pressure, and only if the society comes together to act unanimously like a gentlemen can we expect him to do the same. 

Of course there are always the flip side of the coin for every form of argument, and i accept not every men thinks it was "worthy" (seriously, you need to find worth to appear a nice guy.. really?) to be gentlemen since i am of no value to them. Some men may also find standing on the side of the road that has first contact with the traffic when walking with a woman as unneccessary. Some men told me it is a form of training for when the woman is alone without a man to help, and all the other form of reason i find acceptable.... 

Which still brings me back the point, do you really need to find the worth for being a gentlemen? Literally? Because otherwise, we will definitely see you the way you want to be seen - as a man who expects everything in return. .. and of course, if that is the way you want to be recognise, then i'm sorry to think of you otherwise... 

man.. you need to be start acting like a man.. period.